Can We All Please Stop Having A Collective Breakdown? Or Maybe That’s Just Me 😉

Another day — another virus variant.

Alpha. Delta. I feel like I’m living in a “Star Trek” episode and because of this, I am hereby declaring another soon to be discovered variant which I henceforth name “The Jean Luc Picard Variant” — this particular variant is dangerous because — well — it’s Jean Luc Picard!

And it goes a little something like this:

Jean Luc: “Engage the photon torpedoes”

Me: “I’m not really sure that will help, Jean Luc, as the virus appears to be airborne, I believe.”

Jean Luc looks irritated and furrows his brow.

He then sonically booms forth in a commanding manner this: “Thrusters on full” to which I then coquettishly reply: “But Jean Luc! We’ve only just met” — at which point he then drinks Earl Grey tea with me and we chat and flirt.

In my current alternate reality this is far more preferable and also given my already existent vampiric tendencies wearing a mask and dark sunglasses while grocery shopping is really not the most awful thing; I think rather it’s the inherent uncertainty of all this that we are collectively having to deal with right now.

Wear a mask. Don’t wear a mask. Okay - now maybe wear a mask again.

But it depends.

Localized outbreaks? Which vaccine offers the best protection? Social distancing too? I thought “Covid Covid you bastard, I’m through.”